'Twas the night 'fore the demo and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, 'cept my SE and his mouse;
I'd proposed a big licensing deal with great care
In hopes a big order soon would be there;
Management was restless and not in their beds
As visions of bonuses danced in their heads;
And my VP with his forecast and me with my own,
Had just started a long EOQ roam,
When out from my mobile there came a great ring-tone,
I sprang from my chair to answer my phone,
What could it be? Was it good news or no?
A last-minute order? A contract? PO?
Greetings, said my assistant, who spoke on the line,
It was someone to see me, offering help at this time!
Who could it be at this late eleventh-hour,
To make the deal sweet and avoid something sour?
Away to the door I flew in a flash,
And swept it open in my quest for fast cash,
When who to my wondering eyes should appear,
The Demo Guru! And standing so near!
He came in my office and, while dusting off snow,
Said, "I have some news that you'll want to know."
He drew up a chair and asked for some tea,
And said to my VP, SE and to me:
"Your deal is in trouble and I'll tell you now,
Your demo's confusing, complex and lacks 'Wow!'
It's riddled with features and functions and more,
And too many cool things, mouse clicks galore,
Don't flog them with features and other neat stuff,
Stick with the substance, stay away from the fluff,
The more that you show is not always nice,
Customers may say, 'Please lower the price!'
Peter Cohan runs The Second Derivative out of Belmont, California. For more information, visit www.SecondDerivative.com.