Question

Topic: Copywriting

Elevator Pitch? I Am So Not A Writer!

Posted by Anonymous on 2/17/2014 at 5:55 PM ET 125 Points
I need help, suggestions on a better and more concise re-write.I am certainly not a copywriter (obviously).
I appreciate everyone's contributions as they may come.

My version, so far:


Question: So what does ICG do?

"Allow me to share the most common reaction we hear after giving a tour of our operation.”

“Wow, I never realized you guys did all this in-house!”

“As you take a tour through our operation, we will help you visualize how the deliverables of your marketing plan being executed in a different, more efficient, more cost effective workflow saves your team time and saves you money. You can have photography, digital printing, large scale graphics, trade show support, fulfillment, and even complete campaigns produced within one building.”
“It actually is this simple: ICG helps our advertising & marketing clients become more efficient with their team’s resources while never losing focus on the best outcome of all; a happy client."

"How do you think you might benefit from a single source workflow like this?




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RESPONSES

  • Posted by Jay Hamilton-Roth on 2/17/2014 at 6:09 PM Accepted
    Your version is mostly a list of services that you offer with some generic platitudes. You're likely to benefit from the services of a professional copywriter. In the meantime, consider thinking like someone who knows nothing about ICG. How did they find out about you? Who are "they"? What's their title/department? What do they think you do? What makes you special (do you specialize)? How much better will their business be after working with you? What does in-house matter to them?
  • Posted on 2/17/2014 at 6:24 PM Author
    Holy Cow, I knew that! (looking kinda embarrassed)

    Thank you Jay, I'm going to answer those questions with better writing.

  • Posted by mgoodman on 2/17/2014 at 8:59 PM Accepted
    It's not about writing or being a writer. It's about understanding the core positioning benefit for your primary target audience. I've read what you've written twice now and I still don't really know if I'm in your target audience or not, or whether I can use what you do or not.

    You might want some help with positioning BEFORE you worry about the elevator pitch.
  • Posted by Gary Bloomer on 2/17/2014 at 10:19 PM Member
    Client Q: What does ICG do?

    Your answer: We save you time and money, and we make you look great into the bargain.

    Client Q: Really, how do you do that?

    Your answer: ICG produces advertising and marketing photography, digital printing, large scale graphics, trade show support, fulfillment, and complete campaigns under one roof.
  • Posted by Moriarty on 2/18/2014 at 1:37 PM Member
    Okay so far. For myself, I don't do "elevator pitches" - I speak with people and find out what they do and what they need first. Then I check to see if they'd make a good customer or not (it only takes one question, by the way) - and only then do I suggest something that might interest them.

  • Posted on 2/18/2014 at 7:31 PM Author
    Thank you everyone, it's obvious we need assistance on both topics.
  • Posted by Moriarty on 2/19/2014 at 3:09 AM Member
    You need assistance of a kind that will give you the self confidence to speak with others and offer precisely what they need of you. The real task of a marketer is to make themselves redundant.
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