Know-How Exchange : Other

Understood that you prefer email, but what we are saying is that these types of things require relationships and those unfortunately are not built over email.

You have someone who did not respond before. Likely they will do the same when receiving a second email. At least that is what I would do if I was the recipient and I didn't respond before. Hence my suggestion saying to call, which is much better at building a relationship than an email.

Sounds like you will do email anyway - so on improving the text, you wrote: "...any construction projects that might be of interest to us?" This should not be about what is of interest to you, but should be about how you can help them. Something like "...any constructions projects where we could help you out with?" would be better.

If you're simply hoping to "get noticed", then you would best be served not by asking "anything for us", but rather highlight your unique skills in terms that the architect would care about. From their perspective, what hard problems can "only you" help them solve faster/easier?

"I do not want to hard sell to him."

And you're wise not to. However you need to speak to his compulsions, which means you'd do well to talk about the recipient's needs over your own. In your message you talk about yourself roughly twice as much as you talk about your recipient's needs. This is a mistake that's costing you appointments.

Fine, I get it, you don't want to call. So use your e-mail to set up an appointment in which you demonstrate your capabilities: you need this person more than they need you. Prove it by talking about the recipient's needs, desires, dreams, and aspirations. Show him how you can make him look good, how you can save him money, time, and stress.

Heeey Greenteaz3n,

you asked for advice and that's exactly what you're going to get. The following comments, suggestions and strategies are based on proven solutions that work. With that said your email could definitely use a number of insider secrets that will impact your end user Allen in a very positive way if he decides to open your email.

But way before Allen is lucky enough to get to your email…(the specific words you have shared above)...he must make a "Big Decision".

This decision is no different for your contact person (Allen) as it is for you and the billions of other people who struggle with managing an email inbox "full to the brim" of hundreds of new emails every single day.

And this "Big Decision" that Allen will struggle with the day your email arrives in his inbox will be shaped by this single question…

"Why should Allen answer greenteaz3n's email today out of all the other hundreds of emails in his inbox?"


Now based on the proven research and the test that have already been done…we already know that certain people will get their emails open…almost Immediately…people like "Allen's Boss…Allen's Customers…Allen's Prospects (who are sitting on a proposal he gave them a few days ago)...Allen's Significant Other…Allen's Children… and Allen's Friends"…these people will have no problem getting their emails opened…and most of them answered.

However after Allen has opened up all these "First Tier Email" contacts...then he begins to squirm in his seat and struggle (because he doesn't have a lot of time left…and he's got Reports to get done, Meetings to attend and Phone calls to make…besides he's got to eat lunch).

But his struggle and the anxiety inside of him is Overwhelming because of all the other dozens and dozens of emails he has to open based on who he "Knows", who he "Likes" and who he "Trust"…and the Limited Time he has to get his work done.

And that's when he briefly see's your email…and if you're not in the group of those he knows, likes and trust…he puts you off till tomorrow…because he doesn't have time.

So above you've provided us with an email…an email without a "Title"…an email without a "Subject Line"…and way before Allen is ever going to see your email letter he's going to scan his emails for what they say in the "Subject Line"…

and when he doesn't see a "Subject Line" for your email…he's going to instantly lose attention because we are all in the attention deficit age…the age where we don't have time to "Pay Attention" unless we are being "Paid" to "Pay Attention".

So before you even begin an email you must deal first with the The First Thing First... you must deal with the "Subject Line" of your email because it is actually more important than your email…

Why?

Because people read this first…and if this "Subject Line" is Missing or isn't Speaking to the end user in a way that makes the End-User "Feel Good"…"Feel Inspired"…"Feel Needed" …or in a way that Grabs the End-Users Attention in a way that is Believable, Interesting, Beneficial or Important to them…your email is not going to get open at all.


Sooo Now let's deal with your email:


Hi Allen,


I hope you are well.

(the word "well" is too broad and depending on where Allen is when he reads your email he could assume you might think he's not feeling well. "I hope you are having a good day" or "I hope you're having a great day" is more assertive and inspiring…even if his day is not going well).

The remainder of your email needs to focus on serving "Allen's needs". People are only concerned about "What you can do for them"…and if you can't do anything for them…they're not concerned about your needs.

The moment Allen reads all the "I's" in your email…he will Instantly know that your email is not about him…because it is focused on "You".

What you must do now is sit down and quickly rewrite your letter…

When you rewrite it you must remove all of the "I's" out of it that you can…the more you can eliminate the "I's" and reconstruct your sentences to "Appeal & Focus" on Allen…the BETTER and the GREATER your chances are at getting Allen to take an interest in your email.

Remember you haven't spoken to Allen since last year October and that's almost a whole entire year. If you were smart you wouldn't even mention your interest about the things you've placed in your email above. Strategically it would be better if you would approach this principally like we do when we are dating. If we haven't talked to someone we are interested in…we approach it slowly because we understand we can't ask someone in the early part of the dating process the kinds of things we can ask a person about when we've had a few dates with them. (I'm in no way telling you what to do…but your current email comes across as a "Me Focused Email" and those kinds of emails are always a big turn-off because they don't Appeal to the End-User.

Well there you go…you asked for "Advice" on your email…and you got it. Wishing you the Best in all your email campaigns.

How else May I SERVE You greenteaz3n?


Your Servant,

Lovingly Deremiah *CPE, (Customer Passion Expert)