Question

Topic: Copywriting

Help With Mission Statement

Posted by Anonymous on 7/20/2017 at 1:26 AM ET 250 Points
We are a company that donates a portion of our profits (through our travel site) to local charities. We recommend independent hotels, B&B's etc that are environmentally responsible and support local community building. We curate all the information on our website and the customer books directly with the hotel. We give a percentage of our profits to the charity supported and recommended by the hotel (and or tour/activity business). I am trying to get this across in our mission statement but feel like I am not using the right words and making it clear. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

We connect travelers with independent businesses and socially responsible travel experiences that champion neighbourhood charities and support community building practices. We also donate a portion of our profits to help enhance their efforts.
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RESPONSES

  • Posted by telemoxie on 7/20/2017 at 7:22 AM Member
    The more information we have, the more helpful we can try to be. Can you please add your website to your profile page?

    I'm curious, are you tied in to the, "slow cities" or "slow food" movements? (as described in the book, "In Praise of Slowness" ?)
  • Posted by Jay Hamilton-Roth on 7/20/2017 at 9:47 AM Member
    Start your mission statement about your deepest beliefs. Then transition to how you achieve it.

    What makes your business better than the competition? Start there.
  • Posted by Peter (henna gaijin) on 7/20/2017 at 11:20 AM Member
    I think your mission statement needs to talk more about your basic business and how you fill your customer's travel needs. The donating and supporting charities is a bit of an aside - good to talk about but should not be your focus. The basic business (what people pay you for) and how you are the best at that should be the focus.
  • Posted on 7/20/2017 at 11:36 AM Author
    Sorry the website isn't live yet we are currently building it. We don't charge the traveler anything, unlike all those Air BnB sites that shaft the person looking for up to 15% we charge nothing. We also don't hit the hotel for 30% on every booking made through our site. We send tourists/travelers to the hotels sites directly to book, we charge the hotel or accommodation 12% for the booking.

    Our business is the last three lines

    We connect travelers with independent businesses and socially responsible travel experiences that champion neighbourhood charities and support community building practices. We also donate a portion of our profits to help enhance their efforts.

    We are aware of the slow cities movement but we are not tied into it at the present time anyways.
  • Posted by Mike Steffes on 7/20/2017 at 2:53 PM Accepted
    Our Mission
    We will help support communities by connecting travelers with socially responsible travel experiences.
  • Posted by mgoodman on 7/20/2017 at 4:25 PM Accepted
    The word "help" in a mission or positioning statement weakens the promise. (Sorry, Mike Steffes.) Focus on what you DO for the customer, not on how you can be a small part of something that is ultimately their responsibility. "Help" says you are not willing to accept responsibility for your deliverable.

    And don't confuse the benefit promise with how you choose to spend your profit. Just focus on the core benefit -- meaningful and memorable travel experiences.

    "Our Mission is to connect socially responsible travelers with meaningful and memorable travel experiences."
  • Posted by andrew on 7/20/2017 at 5:21 PM Accepted
    I actually think yours is pretty good, @Daehder. Perhaps a slight re-wording, and minifying, but I think it is nice:

    We connect travellers with independent businesses and facilitate socially responsible travel experiences that support neighbourhood charities and communities.
  • Posted by dubois on 7/20/2017 at 7:55 PM Accepted
    Those are on the right track. Mission statements are hard, you're not alone. The mission statement is often confused with a positioning statement, vision statement, or marketing messages. I assume you are working on those other things, too.

    Start your mission statement by describing an outcome. Perhaps that is to strengthen local communities or protect the environment. Then answer how you do that, in broad terms, e.g., by connecting socially responsible travellers with experiences they will love, or with hotel stays that are consistent with their beliefs.
  • Posted on 7/21/2017 at 2:03 AM Author
    Yes I am working on the mission, vision, guiding principles etc - the mission was giving me a little bit of a hard time because I wanted it to be short and sweet - so thanks everyone.
  • Posted by dubois on 7/21/2017 at 7:30 PM Accepted
    "To build sustainable communities by promoting socially responsible travel."
  • Posted on 7/22/2017 at 2:11 AM Author
    Thanks everyone this has been an enormous help.
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