Question

Topic: Taglines/Names

Need Headline For B2b Trade Ad + Creative Opinion

Posted by Anonymous on 5/12/2008 at 11:26 AM ET 500 Points
Hi Folks -

We are placing a B2B ad in a very popular Gift Retailer magazine and need to come up with a catchy headline to go along with our creative.

Our computer mouse line is very unique to the gift industry and feel that it can really shine with the proper campaign. We already have many retailers doing very well with them across the country.

Along with headline suggestions, please give me your choice of creative that you like the best, or suggest another idea.

Prelim copy and 4 ad variations can be seen here:
[inactive link removed]

Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

Many thanks,
Mouse




[Moderator: Inactive link removed from post. 2/14/2011]
To continue reading this question and the solution, sign up ... it's free!
SUBSCRIBE
Or, SIGN IN

RESPONSES

  • Posted on 5/12/2008 at 2:32 PM Member
    Do you need to have the hands in the ad? If they're white or black they imply ethnicity, and the green hands remind me of the Grinch. Could you make the mouse your focus and really let it star?

    As for a tagline....

    The Mouse with the Most!

    Click with class

  • Posted on 5/12/2008 at 3:08 PM Author
    Thank you for the response Gail.

    Since mouses are used with hands, I wanted to include hands in the ad in an interesting way so the ad stands out. I think the green color and black silhouettes add vibrancy to the ad, and don't think anyone will be thinking about "ethnicity" - could be wrong though :)

    Tagline should be addressing retailers, not consumers.

    Thanks!
  • Posted on 5/12/2008 at 3:38 PM Accepted
    Hi Mouse,

    With a trade pub, you need to stop the eye (and keep the hand from turning the page). You can do it with a good headline -- but you can also do it with arresting visuals. I agree with Gail -- my eye is not getting the idea that your mouse line is anything special. The hands are distracting, and aren't arresting enough to make me stop and look at the much-smaller-than-the-hands mouse. And they're making your ad look amateurish. If your mouse line is unique, then feature that line in your ad.

    If you can tell us more about why your mouse line is unique, we may be able to create a headline that ties in with a range of mice as the visual.
  • Posted on 5/12/2008 at 5:30 PM Author
    Hi kmarch -

    I'm trying to stop the eye by being unique. Most trade ads just have beauty shots of their products, and this is boring to me.

    This is a unique collection that includes over 40 different styles to suit a variety of tastes and lifestyles. This line is geared more towards the gift industry, make it suitable for a wide range of retailers. Our stores range from Museum Shops to Departments stores to Hallmarks.

    I've included a good sampling of the line in this version:
    https://www.vitalgroupinc.com/comp2.jpg

    Please also keep in mind that all graphics will be hi-res, this is a comp only.

    Thanks!


  • Posted by saul.dobney on 5/13/2008 at 5:28 AM Member
    Mouses move Houses - great gifts for great customers

    Hide the cheese - give a quality gift

    In the palm of your hand

    Handsome Gifts

    Look what the cat brought in

    Cool for cats

    Something to hand over (or Hand it over!)





  • Posted by Jay Hamilton-Roth on 5/13/2008 at 8:32 AM Member
    #1 - It reminds me of the Apple iPod ads. However, when I see a hand holding something gingerly, it makes me think that what's being held is something to discard. So, if you can use the hand from #3, blacking it out entirely (removing the wrinkles & nails), use the mouse from #1 (gold), it'll be more appealing (the skull & crossbones doesn't equate to "fancy").

    Point To The Winner
    Great Gifts Come In Small Packages
    Let Them Personalize Their Computer
  • Posted on 5/13/2008 at 11:16 AM Accepted
    I agree with the above. Lose the hand. If the product is the star, the product should be front and center.

    Perhaps in place of the hand you should consider a bold, oversized headline that really hits the main product feature, which, as I see it, is the individuality aspect of the product.

    Here's one head, for example, that does that, while also folding in a retailer benefit:

    When it comes to sales,
    you can't clone these mice.

    Here's another idea:

    The mouse that roars at the register.

    Or how about:

    Click. Click. Ka-ching!

    Well, I've got my own ads to come up with now.
    Hope this helps.

    Paul_T

  • Posted on 5/13/2008 at 11:55 AM Author
    Saul: Thanks for the suggestions.

    Jay: Yes, iPod ads! That's the type of look I'm going for. Thanks for your comments.

    Paul: I love "Click. Click. Ka-ching"! It captures the product and the retailer benefit perfectly. This may be the one to use, thanks.
  • Posted by Levon on 5/13/2008 at 4:36 PM Member
    Have that ad agency Vital Group bling out the design a little more. Maybe these are rough drafts, but #3 would be best utilized with a hot model with skinny fingers and smooth hands holding a mouse that matches her outfit.

  • Posted by Johane on 5/14/2008 at 5:32 PM Member
    or "Click. Bling. Ka-ching."
  • Posted on 5/15/2008 at 7:26 PM Accepted
    I'm on board with losing the hands...you can make more of an impact with a larger image and/or multiple images to show the variety - both "luxe" and "cute" to show the range.

    Love "click click ka-ching!" put that in a bold font to catch attention. You can be creative with graphics/borders, etc around the images.

    I understand wanting to stand out and be different; sometimes that's achieved with minimal changes.

    Good luck!
  • Posted by Chris Blackman on 5/19/2008 at 8:57 PM Accepted
    How about a variation on the old adage "Build a better mousetrap, and the world will beat a path to your door"

    The ad is aimed at retailers. They want more traffic.

    So... If they stock your pimped-up bling-mouse... Your promise to them is:

    "The world will beat a path to your door".

    Leave the hands out. Show a whole page full of every variant of the mouse that you sell, if they fit.

    Create special limited-edition mouses. Like Faberge eggs, ladybirds, baseball, basketball, football, Pumpkins, Christmas and Hanukkah symbols, etc...

    Hope that helps.

    ChrisB
  • Posted on 5/23/2008 at 10:06 AM Author
    Thank you all for your great responses and helpful ideas. The ones I rewarded were exceptionally helpful as we crafted our ad.

    This forum is a great asset to everyone and I am sure to continue using it in the future.

    Regards,
    Mouse
BACK TO TOP

Post a Comment

Related Discussions

Community Info

Top 25 Experts
(Taglines/Names)