Question

Topic: Taglines/Names

Critique My Tag Line

Posted by Anonymous on 1/29/2009 at 1:39 PM ET 25 Points
I RENT A BEACH HOUSE IN COSTA RICA. I HAVE NAMED THE HOUSE, "CASA MARBELLA"....IT TRANSLATES TO "BEAUTIFUL-OCEAN HOUSE".
I NEED A TAG LINE......I WANT TO ATTRACT PEOPLE WHO PREFER TO RENT A HOUSE OVER AN ALL INCLUSIVE HOTEL.....THE HOUSE IS LOCATED IN A PRIVATE GATED COMMUNITY WITH AN AWARD WINNING TRANQUIL BEACH WITH POOLS, TENNIS & VOLLEYBALL COURTS, BARBQUE AND HAMMOCK AREAS.


CASA MARBELLA
.....your breeze of relaxation...
NOT your all-inclusive hotel experience!
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RESPONSES

  • Posted by wnelson on 1/29/2009 at 1:54 PM Accepted
    Personally, I don't like it at all. "a breeze of relaxation" is not a good analogous phrase. In a tag line, you want to conjure an "image." While I "get it," it takes a couple layers of translation before I do. Too much thinking. Plus, putting "NOT your all-inclusive hotel experience" in there draws attention to the competition without highlighting why that's such a bad thing.

    How about something like "A luxury living alternative to a cookie cutter hotel."

    I hope this helps.

    Wayde
  • Posted by wnelson on 1/29/2009 at 1:55 PM Member
    Maybe scratch the "living" part and just say, "A luxury alternative to a cookie cutter hotel."

    Wayde
  • Posted on 1/29/2009 at 2:05 PM Author
    YES! I like, "A luxury alternative to a cookie cutter hotel"...

    wondering....."A luxury alternative to the all-inclusive experience"

    OR

    "A luxury alternative to the all-inclusive hotel"

    cookie cutter......is good too though.
  • Posted by wnelson on 1/29/2009 at 10:36 PM Member
    To me, "all inclusive" is a good thing. The opposite of that would be "partial." That means it's not complete and/or I have to pay more. I don't think that's what you mean. I think that you are differentiating your offering to an experience that's pre-determined and the same for everyone who goes through it. You need to make the difference sound strongly negative. Your offering is a unique experience. The customer makes his own experience. Thus, I used "cookie cutter." Some other ways to describe it is "assembly line vacation," "one-size-fits-all vacation," or "a vacation scripted like a bad movie."

    Wayde
  • Posted on 1/30/2009 at 12:09 AM Author
    Wayde,

    You are ABSOLUTELY CORRECT!! I agree with your reasoning.....it clearly describes my intention of the tag line. I will sleep on it -for the whole weekend-and decide by Monday. Thank you!

    Elizabeth
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