Question

Topic: Copywriting

Please Help Me Phrase My Promotional Message

Posted by Anonymous on 3/5/2009 at 5:19 AM ET 250 Points
Hello everyone,

I'm not well verse in english, particularly phrasing my message so I hope you guys can help me out.

We gives out co-branded tissue paper for free to everyone and I'll like to organize a lucky draw to reward those who has picked up the tissue papers and use them.

I'll like to advertise at the back of the tissue paper packs saying something like.

--
We'll like to thank you for using our product by rewarding you with our lucky draw.

We're always looking for ways to improve our service and we'd love to know what you think about our product (co branded tissue paper packs), what you like or dislike, or you'll just like to simply thank/compliment us for providing such an excellent service

Please visit sample.com/luckydraw and fill in the form now!
Name:
Contact:
Feedback:

You'll automatically be enrolled into our lucky draw and stand a chance to win

1) 1st prize
2) 2nd prize
3) 3rd prize
---

Something like this.. hope you guys can help me out in structuring and phrasing my promotional message correctly.

Many thanks!
Josh
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RESPONSES

  • Posted on 3/5/2009 at 8:53 AM Accepted
    You can win a ______________(put fabulous prize here) Just go to __________(URL) and share your opinion about these tissues.
  • Posted by Corpcommer on 3/10/2009 at 11:52 PM Accepted
    Josh, keep the message brief so people will read it.

    Also, have one main prize and reward anyone who gives you comments -- maybe give them a discount coupon on the next purchase.

    My message for the back of the tissue paper packs:

    "Tell us what you think of our products and get a reward. Visit sample.com/luckydraw for details."


    Joshn, let us know what you decide.

    Corpcommer - MC
  • Posted on 3/12/2009 at 2:11 PM Accepted
    On the Package:

    Thank you for using ____(Brand Name)__!

    We want to know what you think of our tissues.

    Please visit __(url)___ and share for a chance to one one of many great prizes and to download a coupon for your next purchase.

    ________
    On the website say:

    Just for trying __(brand)___ and sharing your thoughts below, you will be entered in a drawing to win one of three prizes.. 1st, 2nd, 3rd. Just for visiting the website today, this .50 printable coupon is our gift to you.

    Thank you for using ___(Brand)__



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