Question

Topic: Just for Fun

Chicken Zoop For The Marketing Soul'dier

Posted by Anonymous on 7/25/2005 at 6:15 PM ET 500 Points
How about some marketing quips to lighten your day, make you laugh, make you think, or maybe something just so simple it was just brilliant marketing. Add your own to the following:

1) Real life - I just visited Hilton Head SC, a high end vacation spot, slammed full of golf courses, fountains, immaculate roads, and where if they had a Super 8 Motel, it would also cost $200+ a night. But about 10 miels before going into the city, before you see anything else, there is a rather ordinary size street bridge crossing HWY 278 with some incredible design aspects including unique arches, covered in a unique stone pattern, and with a couple of guard towers. Nothing is overstated, dramatic, there are no signs, no "You have arrived" indicators. It's just understated elegance that is rarely if ever seen on an American bridge. I told my wife... "Now that is marketing". It says, "you're at Hilton Head and it's different here", but without saying it and without anything that could be labeled as ostentatious. It's marketing brilliance as is the rest of the city. Never let it be said that there is no PLACE called marketing. It's just that it's stage name is Hilton Head SC.

2) Quip -

Man #1 opens a hardware store in a strip mall and puts up a sign that says "Hardware Store". THAT is market segmentation.

Man #2 opens up right next door with his hardware store and places a sign over his store that says "Best Selection". THAT is advertising.

Man #3 opens up another hardware store on the other side of man #1 and places a sign above his store that says, "Best Prices". THAT is market share strategy.

Annoyed but not to be outdone, man #1 in the middle puts a sign higher than anyone else with an arrow pointing at his door that says, "Main Entrance". Now THAT my friends... is just plain ol' MARKETING"
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  • Posted by Deremiah *CPE on 7/26/2005 at 12:28 PM Accepted
    Steve,

    In this life people are always looking for a free meal, somebody to give them something without them having to make any effort on their part. But the universe does not function this way. Long ago a famous writer by the name of Luke, wrote in his ancient text the real key to obtaining more from life than we could ever imagine when he wrote these words "Give and it shall be given unto you, good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over shall men pour into your bosom.

    THERE ARE NO FREE MEALS...(everything begins with giving)
    here'a a nice short illustration I like to tell from time to time that helps remind us that there are no free meals.

    There was once a restaurant owner who put a huge sign on the outside of his restaurant that said

    "Free Meal Tomorrow"

    And everyday, people would come from miles around by the bus loads just to get there free meal...

    but the sign outside the restaurant never changed.

    It still said "FREE Meal Tomorrow".


    Hope you enjoyed it. Is there anything else I can do for you?

    Your Servant, Deremiah, *CPE (Customer Passion Evangelist)

    C-reating P-owerful E-citement
  • Posted by SteveByrneMarketing on 7/26/2005 at 5:54 PM Accepted
    Hi Steve,

    here's some semi-related amusement.

    THE SHEPHERD AND THE CONSULTANT

    A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of the dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the shepherd,.......... "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?"

    The shepherd looked at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looked at his peacefully-grazing flock and calmly answered, "Sure."

    The yuppie parked his car, whipped out his IBM Thinkpad and connected it to a cell phone, then he surfed to a NASA page on the internet where he called up a GPS satellite navigation system, scanned the area, and then opened up a database and an Excel spreadsheet with complex formulas. He sent an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, received a response. Finally, he prints out a 150 page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized printer then turns to the shepherd and says,.........

    "You have exactly 1586 sheep."

    "That is correct; take one of the sheep" said the shepherd.
    He watches the young man select one of the animals and bundle it into his car.

    Then the shepherd says: "If I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back the animal?"

    "OK, why not" answered the young man.

    "Clearly, you are a consultant" said the shepherd.

    "That's correct" says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

    "No guessing required" answers the shepherd. "You turned up here although nobody called you. You want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked, and you don't know crap about my business. Now give me back my dog."

    -Steve
  • Posted by Deremiah *CPE on 7/26/2005 at 7:21 PM Member
    Steve,

    I agree with you...that ancient book is full of truths that can not be compared to any other. It almost appears to be endless in it's capability. Thanks for your warm compliment and I'm glad you like it.

    Your Servant, Deremiah
  • Posted by SRyan ;] on 7/28/2005 at 2:10 AM Accepted
    Steve, this one will never make it into anyone's Good Book, I'm afraid.

    Ever seen one of those magnetic business cards? Okay, what if you were a PC repair shop, and your less-than-enlightened customers affixed your card to the chassis of their computers... voila! Mysterious hard drive failures, and nonstop service requests.

    Makes ya think, doesn't it?   ;]
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